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I know..

I can tell you what it's like to be one of those victims.. one of the survivors!

I know what it's like to be pushed, shoved, slapped, kicked, beaten.

I know how it feels to be degraded in front of family and friends.

I know what it's like not to have any control over finances - to beg for money for formula for a newborn baby and to later find $2500 in my husband's jacket pocket.

I know the humiliation of being made to sleep on the floor because my husband said I wasn't worthy enough to sleep in "his" bed

I know the ultimate degradation of having my glasses hidden, so that I could not navigate in my own home, much less in the outside world.

I know the terror of seeing my nine month old daughter held by her feet - her father threatening to drop her unless I did what he wanted.

I know the feeling of a woman who is trapped. Trapped, with no money, no education, no skills, in an abusive situation which was slowly wearing away my spirit and my soul... day by day.

I can also tell you what it is like to be the butterfly that breaks out of the cocoon; how I felt when I was able to breathe, really breathe, again... the loveliness of the world when it no longer shadowed by pain and fear and violence ... and finally my relief when I realized that I had power and control over my own life.


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You know.. as I write out the title to this blog, I am actually sitting here crying and the song, "Letter" by Kyndal Inskeep just came on my phone. Hearing about your biological dad saying more stuff

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